BYLINE: Michael R. Malone
Many sense that we are living in times of increasing uncertainty. Not only do we all experience personal loss and grief from time to time, but the individual heart cannot help but feel burdened under the collective weight of suffering—environmental disasters, polarization, and global upheaval—and the destabilizing presence of great uncertainty.
“Some people who are down or depressed experience a reduction in positive emotions and enjoyment of activities. It’s a common component of depression when things that previously brought joy no longer do,” explained Jill Ehrenreich-May, professor and associate chair of the University of Miami College of Arts and Sciences’ Department of Psychology.
“When I think about hope, I think about a strategy to engage with those positive emotions that we’re having trouble getting in touch with,” she added.
Ehrenreich-May highlighted growing neuroscience research into the practice of “savoring.” Putting people in contact with those things that make them feel hopeful or that bring a greater level of engagement and enjoyment, such as being with others or being in nature, has proved beneficial in shifting depression and anxiety.
“Contact alone with those situations or things may not be enough,” she noted. “We may have to engage in a deliberate process to pay attention, encode, and engage with those things that bring us joy, that bring us hope, in a way that may not feel intuitive when you feel down.”
She recognized that there will be times when life feels especially stressful and highlighted that grief and loss cannot simply be transcended.
“You may not intrinsically feel all that motivated to savor the positive things because there’s some grieving or loss that the body may need to do,” said Ehrenreich-May, whose research focuses on generating novel treatment approaches for emotional disorders in youth and adolescents.
“If you’re like just ‘look over there’ to distract yourself, it will feel ingenuine and inorganic when stressors are bigger or more intense. You do not have to wallow in the loss or think about it every minute—allowing the sadness to just be until you’re ready to engage with it in a way that feels more productive or more apt to be useful is the balance,” she said.
While modern society provides for most of what we need to survive and thrive, some people sense that they’re still not as happy as they might be. Others adhere to the belief that progress involves automatic evolution to a better life and society. Yet inevitable advancement is not a given.
“So, it’s not a relentlessly positive attitude that makes us feel better—it’s being selective about the sort of engagement with things that truly are going to bring us joy at the moment,” she said.
Ehrenreich-May noted that children and youth may have a harder time coping with uncertainty and stressful challenges.
“As we get older, we’re able to visit history a bit more and connect the present with the past. We know that everything does get better, or at least, for a period of time, will align with our values and beliefs and preferred experiences in the world,” she said.
“That is a challenging notion for many people, particularly when they have not experienced as many challenging things happening to them in the past or who do not know the frequently iterative nature of the world. This is one of those times where it’s helpful to get the wisdom of the people who have experienced more challenging things,” she added.
For Ehrenreich-May, that anchor was her grandparents, who were Holocaust survivors and often reminded her as a child growing up that you can’t forget about history because it recurs when people forget about it.
“So, you can be hopeful about the future but also know that there are real impediments to getting to that place. Perhaps being realistic and knowledgeable about what those impediments are gives you a more realistic chance at getting to that more hopeful place eventually,” she said.
The truth language of poetry, mindfulness and meditative techniques, and a range of self-care techniques—even indulgence—can help the process.
“There’s a lot of beauty in the world. Finding what brings that spark of joy for you is essential,” said Ehrenreich-May, who noted the enjoyment and sense of peacefulness and focus she gets from her morning exercise routine.
“If I don’t exercise early, I feel like something is a little off,” she said. “One thing that can happen when we’re down or depressed is that we get out of our routines that normally bring us good health and joy. So continuing with these things is really important.
“If you know something brings you joy, do it. Get out in nature, indulge a little here or there, or just experience ‘fun’ or ‘delicious’—those are great words,” Ehrenreich-May said. “It’s not misplaced, it’s not like it takes away your grief or sorrow forever. It’s valuable to have a moment where you’re just taking care of yourself.”
